Full Caf Americano™
From the moment he took the stage Seth MacFarlane exemplified (this guy is so not Billy Crystal) the diminished culture that has given us Barack Obama and a mindset that accepts a $16 trillion debt as though it were a JC Penny charge card.
Morons respond well when morons tell jokes. Which to Hollywood’s credit lets off about half the room last night.
From MacFarlane’s egregious Lincoln assassination joke to Michelle Obama’s shameless last minute pimping of the politicized “Best Picture” award, the Oscars was by far the biggest flop since… well, 2011, when they propped up James Franco and told him to stand there.
Renee Zellweger and Kristen Stewart doubled down on that roll this year. Hey, what are the Oscars without a couple of crapulous actors, right? At least they didn’t get stuck in the elevator at Chateau Marmont with Benicio Del Toro.
Okay, we like Ben Affleck, even though he is a liberal. (Really, what do you expect a guy from Berkley whose middle name is Géza to be?) But “Argo” wasn’t anywhere close to as good as his previous effort, “The Town,” and it didn’t come close to Dark Thirty.
“Zero Dark Thirty” was the mystery nomination last night; if you didn’t know it was nominated before you tuned in, you weren’t going to hear about it on the 85th Annual Oscar’s broadcast. The camera did actually find Bigelow in the audience once, though. They fired the grip.
Shame on Bigelow for not understanding that “Based on a True Story,” is code for “Waterboarding Doesn’t Work, Just Ask Nancy Pelosi.”
So, other than the obnoxious host, the myriad unrelatable-to-anything dance routines, the several drunken presenters, and the show being torturously too long, it went well, don’t you think?
Jane Fonda did do a credible job playing a washed-up movie star, though.